Costa Meet Their Match

Costa Coffee, the company infamous for bullying their way onto our nation's high streets, with or without planning permission have, it seems reached their nadir as Ripon's 'No to Costa' campaign swings into well oiled action.
Of course, other towns have attempted to fight off the coffee chain, but all (save the one notable exception of Totnes in Devon) have failed. Totnes launched a long running, well co-ordinated and vociferous campaign, led by a highly motivated core of activists backed by the loud & largely united voices of the townsfolk. Ripon has adopted a different, more subtle approach, fielding five people on the market square looking glum. The 'Glum 5', as they have become known, are backed by a populous, united in their feigned apathy, and my goodness: what feigned apathy! Of course, this is all a mask to lull Costa's management in to a false sense of security - as soon as they let their guard down (& let it down they will), the clarion will sound & Riponians will rise up as one and man the gingham covered barricades.

photo courtesy of Ripon Gazette

It will be a stirring day indeed when this political leviathan awakes & rumbles into action; or perhaps, & more likely, the sight of the 'Glum 5' alone will be enough to persuade the good folk at Costa to call off the signwriters & shopfitters & move on. In either case, prepare yourself dear reader, for your leader may call, and you may be required to lay down your signature for the cause.

Count the costa Costa

What a wet bunch Ripon shop owners are readers: they've squeaked and squeaked about how utterly dreadful it would be if Costa Coffee came to Ripon, but not one of them has done a thing about it; in fact one of them, who shall remain nameless (or not), has been witless enough to state in the HARROGATE, Knaresborough & Ripon Gazette, that it will be GOOD for the town! Don (Whillans) Grundy (who, would you believe, is secretary of Ripon Chamber of Trade & Commerce) says that 'brands' such as Costa will bring people to Ripon!.....Poor man has clearly suffered some recent traumatic brain injury.  NO-ONE is going to get in their car and drive to Ripon for a cup of Costa coffee!

Here's Don with his carer after the aforementioned blow to the head:

Yes - unfortunately he did have to be straightjacketed, but on the bright side he was given some balloons to play with.

And what, I think I can hear you ask, were Ripon Council doing about the application? Well astoundingly (yes you are astounded) they were doing nothing. Nowt. Zilch. Bugger all! HBC tells us that no objections were received from Ripon City Council - NOT ONE; in fact they've urged us all to look on the bright side. We can only hope the bright side is that they have all resigned by the end of the week. Oh! it IS the end of the week.