One Down.

Yet another meeting in the town hall on Monday and once again the main topic on the agenda for the vast majority of those present was the continuing presence of the Cornetto Kid. You'd think by now, would you not, that he and his rabid mob of supporters would have thrown in the towel but no. The absurd sight of pompous and deluded Mare, Ma McHardy attempting to save his bacon once again left most onlookers incredulous and the question in many people's minds was: what hold does he have over them?
Bizarrely, The Kid was absent from this meeting and there was an unsettling atmosphere of smug self satisfaction amongst the 'Town Hall Mob'; they clearly felt they had a couple of aces up their sleeves and it didn't take long before they were smacked down on the table: they'd taken 'legal advice' and the resolution to rid ourselves of the convicted Williams was, they said invalid. In the end, largely due to public pressure and the excellent work of Councillor Pearson, this was shown to be incorrect and the smugness evaporated.
When questioned about her own involvement with a company called Foss Island Media which was until very recently, registered at her address and of which the Cornetto Kid is a Director, she became flustered and defensive and refused to answer any questions, insisting they should be written in long hand and sent to the council office - so much for clarity and openness!!

Anyway - for the time being at least - the Cornetto Kid may no longer sit on the F&GP committee and I guess Mad Ma McHardy took a bit of calming down after the meeting!

Meet The Town Hall Mob No 4 Andrew (Andy) Williams AKA The Cornetto Kid

Who is he?

Leader of the Town Hall Mob and well known crooner

What Does He Do?

He Chairs the finance committee. No he doesn't. Yes he does, no he doesn't.

The interview:

The PUN caught up with the Cornetto Kid by chance as he was coming out of the public toilets (he seems to have a very weak bladder) but he didn't want to give us an interview: "No, no, NO." he squeaked "I ain't tellin' ya nothin' see? He was running his finger tips over the six guns in his leather holster. "You said my record was terrible  so Ma says I'm not to talk to you so there". The record in question is of course (Andy's) 6 Biggest Hits album of 2010 which you will remember was reviewed on these pages. "Anyway, you wait an' see: I'm gonna make 'em make me top chief cowboy of the council agin or else I'll scweem an sweem an' scweem until I'm sick……an' I can.  "Now git outa here before I reload - I shot all my bullets off at some varmint in there" he nods towards the gents, "but it won't take but a minute to slip another one in the chamber".

At this point we felt it best to leave (We think it's only a cap gun but you never know do you!) so we headed of with our tails tucked safely between our legs.